I had always heard about the Terrible Two’s but completely thought it was an excuse parent’s made when their toddlers kick off and have meltdowns.
I WOULD LIKE TO OFFICIALLY APOLOGISE TO ALL PARENTS…
When Israel and Josiah turned two, nothing changed for us, life just continued as normal. That only strengthened my thoughts of the Terrible Two’s being a myth.
However as time went on, we started to see little changes happening with our two.
It started very small… Israel became super clingy to me and REFUSED to go to anyone else (not even daddy), every time I left the room he would have a meltdown.
As I mentioned in a previous post about sleep training, crying for no reason is something that I find really stressful/overwhelming/irritating.
So, when I would leave to go to the toilet and he cried and screamed, I would tell him that I was in the next room and I was coming right back. When that didn’t work and he’d continue screaming, I would lose my cool and shout at him.
Poor boy, I had just snapped at him because I was annoyed at not being able to use the toilet in peace.
Over the course of a few weeks, he decided that he would now also cling to daddy, which was a breather for me.
What was happening???
We had no idea what was going on or why he was like this. He would be in moods a lot of the time around people, which was embarrassing.
As a family, we go to church every week, and every time anyone would greet Israel, he would refuse to acknowledge the person and cling to us.
It was so embarrassing because it was so rude, people were being nice and he would ignore them. #mortified
Anton and I nicknamed him Our Koala.
Thankfully, Josiah’s changes weren’t the same as Israel’s. He was happy and would go to anyone.
Anton and I don’t let the boys watch children’s tv as such They tend to watch whatever I’m watching, like Homes under the Hammer, Tipping Point, Monkey life and their favourite The Chase 😂
What we do let them watch are nursery rhymes on YouTube, Little Baby Bum and Christian songs. They both love music and to sing.
This wouldn’t even be a daily occurrence but they loved it. Before when they watched it, they were fine when it was time to turn it off.
However, Josiah would have meltdowns and throw himself around EVERY TIME it went off or if he couldn’t have it on. He would pinch me if he didn’t get his own way.
After about a week, Israel decided to join in the screaming 😣😩
I remember snapping at Anton for allowing YouTube as an easy win when they were younger.
What was happening to my non cry-ee children???
What was happening to me? I was losing control and started to dislike motherhood. I had convinced myself that we had done something wrong as parent’s, but I didn’t know what.
HELP, I needed answers!!
I’m a very logical person and I needed answers.
I prayed and asked for answers. After my prayer, I started thinking about the changes Israel and Josiah were going through.
Trying to be more independent whilst still being unable to regulate their emotions.
Once I started to understand this and that we hadn’t done anything wrong I was able to see their struggles, understand it better and help them through it with understanding affirmation, patience and lots of cuddles.
I can guess what you are thinking… this is the Terrible Two’s… but I HONESTLY never knew it was a real thing.
I started reading up on it and, of course, it was all there.
In a way, I am glad that God and I had this time where I could figure it out logically, (with His help). Although, I also wish I would have been more patient with the boys sooner.
Now that I know, and can attribute guilt where it needs to be instead of blaming my poor husband or myself.
NEVER AGAIN will I mock a parent who says it’s the Terrible Two’s and will view things differently when I see a toddler having a meltdown in the shop.
We don’t actually have spoilt, rude or unpleasant children. They are children who are struggling with their emotions and the many changes happening without any explanation in their lives.
Most importantly, THEY ARE TWO!
So, what are the Terrible Twos? and how do you cope?
Research tells us that the Terrible Twos is a normal stage in which toddlers struggle between their dependence on adults and their desire for independence.
One minute your child might be clinging to you, and the next he or she is running in the opposite direction.
There are lots of motor, intellectual, social and emotional changes happen to two-year-olds.
Children are eager to do things on their own. Their vocabularies are increasing and they are beginning to realise that they are expected to follow certain rules.
However, they are still not able to clearly communicate their needs yet or control their feelings. That can lead to frustration and tantrums.
What that means, is…??
With all that being said, our little ones are going through so many changes and they don’t understand why. Everything is extra difficult for them and they don’t themselves know what they want. The Terrible Twos are REAL!